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The Sum Of Regrets

from Beauty Must Suffer by Joshua Starmer

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lyrics

I can’t explain it everything seems like it’s OK
But I’ve got a feeling something bad is on its way
A darker emotion, a mix of fear and shame as one
It weighs like an anchor. I cannot hide I cannot run

I only wish I were stronger
I’d cut my heart from my sleeve
I’d fall apart on the inside
While I watched it bleed
I only ask for forgiveness
And a chance to forget
When every single decision
Is the sum of regrets

The simplest method seems to keep me in the light
I keep myself busy. I never rest I always fight
But I can’t sustain it. Everyone needs to take a break
And that’s when it happens. These memories will never wait

I feel my eyes fill with tear drops
But I can’t seem to cry
I’m being crushed by a sadness
And I don’t know why

Escape from the darkness that closes in with a soft caress
It asks me to linger. I bend to its will, this I confess
It whispers a promise: A candied lie that I believe
But I should know better. It hurts to stay why don’t I leave?

credits

from Beauty Must Suffer, released March 7, 2018

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about

Joshua Starmer Chapel Hill, North Carolina

A native of Chapel Hill, North Carolina, Joshua Starmer is a cellist, composer, and singer whose eclectic sound recalls the string-led pop of Andrew Bird and the quirky compositions of the Penguin Cafe Orchestra, both of whom he cites as influences. A cellist since the age of seven, Starmer eventually wove himself into the fabric of North Carolina's vibrant music scene. ~ Timothy Monger ... more

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